Don't Be Unequally Yoked.....But If You Are

 

 

I’ve always been disturbed by the last two chapters of Ezra. The problem began with the people marrying unbelievers. I’m thrilled that Ezra and others were very upset with this practice that has always been against God’s plan for marriage, but I’m very disturbed about how they handled it. Their solution was to divorce the pagan wives. To bust up their families and leave any of the children fatherless.

 

Why did God let them get away with this? I don’t know. Why did He allow David and Solomon to have so many concubines and wives? Again, I don’t know. What I do know is whether or not they got away with it, multiple spouses and pagan spouses are not God’s will for marriage.

 

The first question couples with marriage on their mind should ask is this: “Are you a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ?” And then very carefully observe the fruit in the lives of their prospective spouse concerning their faith walk to make sure it is the real deal..

 

Why is this so important? It’s important because marriage is first and foremost suppose to be an example to the world of the relationship between Christ and His church. This is the “mystery” that Paul speaks of in his letter to the Ephesians where he addresses the relationship of man and wife in a biblical marriage.

 

Eph 5:31 "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh."  32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

As Christ is joined to the believer so husband is to be joined to wife. How is such a union possible when an unbeliever is in the mix? 2Co 6:14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?  15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?

 

A second priority of marriage is the charge to raise up godly offspring. Speaking about marriage, the prophet Malachi had this to say: Mal 2:15 But did He not make them one, Having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring.

 

It’s hard enough raising godly offspring when both husband and wife are on the same spiritual page, how much more difficult for the mixed marriage!

 

Nonetheless, mixed marriages happen and when they do, are they grounds for the divorce action taken by the people in the days of Ezra? No! A thousand times no! This matter is addressed in the New Testament in 1Co 7:10-16, “Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband.  11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.  12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her.  13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

 

“How do you know?”  You might be the very vessel that God uses to bring your spouse to Christ and isn’t salvation of souls God’s number one priority?

 

1Pe 3:1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

 

There is much more that can be said about the subject of the “permanence of marriage” in relation to the Word of God. But that passage from 1 Cor 7 should give us plenty to chew on. Let’s face it, we could all do a better job at this thing called marriage.  And if we have messed up, remember God forgives. Receive that forgiveness and draw a line in the sand, and from this day forth, seek to follow the guidelines for marriage that God has spelled out in His Word.