# 130 Someone Needs A Family Life Conference

The Book of Genesis Day 130 Ge 16:4 So he went in to Hagar, and she conceived. And when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress became despised in her eyes. 5 Then Sarai said to Abram, "My wrong be upon you! I gave my maid into your embrace; and when she saw that she had conceived, I became despised in her eyes. The LORD judge between you and me." 6 So Abram said to Sarai, "Indeed your maid is in your hand; do to her as you please." And when Sarai dealt harshly with her, she fled from her presence. Okay, now this surrogate parenting idea starts to get real ugly. Sarai goes out of her way to deal harshly with Hagar, and shifts the blame for the whole thing on Abram. (She had a case against Abram, as the head of the household, it is part of his job to guard the family from sinful actions! The buck ultimately stops with Abram here! (See Blog # 41 Man Up) Now, let’s talk a little more about Sarai here. By ancient law she was not allowed to banish Hagar, but the slave was also required to remain in absolute subjection to her mistress. Armed with that knowledge, Sarai (with Abram’s permission) sets out to make life absolutely miserable for Hagar, it was so bad that Hagar eventually decides to run away. Please note that both women were “despised” in each other’s eyes. The word means “belittled.” Hey guys, how would you like to listen to that all day? Two women under one roof constantly belittling each other. This is one fine happy God-fearing household here! We find clueless Abram, scratching his head here, “What did I do? I just did what you asked me to do! And now you’re madder than a wet hornet! You ask God to be the judge between you and me” And in the typical male response he says, I’m not going to talk about this, I’m not going to argue with you, do what you want with Hagar! You know these two could use a Family Life Conference about now. ( Family Life Conferences are put on by Family Life Today and our designed to strengthen marriages!) Does any of this sound familiar to you married couples? The wife throws a little test toward hubby and he thinks he is responding in a way pleasing to her, yet she really wanted him to say no and take a stand! Then, rather than getting into a big time argument about it, he just walks away and says, “OK, have it your way.” And nothing gets resolved! And a certain kind of chill enters the house! Let’s get real here, all three parties have contributed to this mess, but blaming one another, and taking it out on each other, does nothing to resolve the issue. How much further would humility and forgiveness have worked to correct the hard feelings in this situation? The movie “Love Story” which came out in 1970 had an oft quoted line it that went something like this, “ Being in love means that you never have to say I’m sorry.” Oh that sounded so good to us at the time, but I have learned through the years that being in love means I have to say I’m sorry often! And perhaps even more importantly I have to act like it! Pray: Father, this was such a mess, help us to learn that as sinners our Christian marriages aren’t all roses! Thorns come with the package! Give us that spirit of humility and a willingness to forgive that is so necessary to model marriage the way it should be!